I have now been at Trinity Laban for a whole 5 months. A whole 5 months of tears and the best times of my life. When you move to university no one really discusses the thought of struggling when it all kicks off. And fuck me was it a struggle. I have never felt so lost in myself and what I love doing, the sudden change in doing everything on your own and having to fend for yourself is something I didn’t even budget into my worries. But I finally have established a routine, I have friends, and I have so much excitement I’ve never felt before.
It’s also absolutely bloody terrifying. The whole act of getting into drama school is hard enough as it is but when you get in, it all becomes a hell of a lot more real. you are surrounded by über gorgeous and talented people who are all changing and developing and improving everyday and its all so completely motivating (but still terrifying).
The realistic thought that in 2 and a half years I am going to be out in the real world fighting for parts just like anyone else is so so exciting but also mortifying at the same time. But I am trying hard and hoping that improvements are on their way.
I’ve made some incredible new friends. It’s so encouraging to know that I can still make friends after having the same few for so long. And I truly believe they are incredible friends and have my back, and that is so important. After everything that happened in the past 2 years, it’s so pleasing to have some people who I believe have my best interest at heart.
This whole experience has so far been a blur, but it’s a bloody pretty blur to see.